I know it’s halfway through May already, so to say I have goals for the month is kind of pathetic. But I can’t bring myself to give up on this month, even though I totally want to.

To be honest, I’ve been really disappointed in my goal-achieving over the last few weeks, and it is so much easier to wallow and feel like a failure than to pick myself up and start all over again. So. Much Easier.

This past Saturday was The Color Run, when I participated last year I was able to actually run about half [1.5ish miles] and from that moment I wanted to become a runner. Like, a real life runner, someone who enjoys it and goes out to run for the fun of it… and even if that never happened I wanted to at least be able to run an entire 5k without wanting to kill myself. But I’d be lying if I said I hadn’t already started dreaming of running 10k’s and Half Marathons.

About a month ago, after posting that one of my April goals was to run outside, I got off the treadmill and went to a local track to run. Lets just say after that attempt, a walk around the neighborhood later that day and a photo shoot at Da Vinci I could barely walk to the car my foot hurt so bad. And it just went down hill from there. Apparently ground is a lot harder than treadmill and the impact on my heel was not pleasant.

So this past Saturday when I pulled out of my driveway at 5:45am heading to The Color Run I was just disappointed in myself. After a year of waiting and working to be able to run I was going to be walking the entire 5k. Talk about feeling like a failure. :[ Especially because Alexis has been training with me and she totally could have run the whole thing but she didn’t, she stayed behind to walk with me. Basically I failed myself and I failed her. :[

So, the reality is, goal setting is far, far from something I want to do right now. I’m here purely out of pride because I don’t want to skip one of these posts all year. I am not an amazing person who is picking herself up after a major disappointment and being all inspirational as I move forward. Nope. I’m not inspirational, I’m definitely still wallowing. ;] But either way, here are my May goals.

1. Continue icing my foot. As it is the only thing the doctor told me would help my heel pain. So helpful. 😛
2. Decorate my walls. The walls in my room are now completely white and I love it, now I need to start hanging prints and adding pops of color. Because materialistic things will fill the void of disappointment, right?
3. Bawl my eyes out watching the series finale of The Office this week. I haven’t really kept up with the show since Michael Scott left, but I watched a bunch of season 9 yesterday so I’m ready for the finale. And just to make sure we’re all on the same page: we’re all going to pretend John Krasinski and Jenna Fischer are going to live happily ever after like they’re married in real life. Jim&Pam♥